#i keep feeling like i have to be on here All The Time to maintain social progress ive made instead of trying to find a balance of being

[cloverapple]

How To Finally Shift If You’ve Been Trying For 2+ Years

⚠️ Little warning before we begin: don’t get scared off! I might sound a little negative at first, but that’s not the point of this post. My goal is for you to reach the end of this and think “Oh, I’m definitely going to shift to my DR now!”

Having said that:

If you’ve been on your shifting journey for two or more years, doing methods, reprogramming your mind, consuming advice, maintaining a mental diet, manifesting, forcing assumptions, trying to create assumptions, etc, etc⏤and you still haven’t shifted your awareness to your DR, maybe it’s time to stop trying to make yourself shift.

Stop trying to shift.

Stop trying to trigger a shift.

Maybe the thing you need at this point in your journey is to stop trying to make yourself shift.

And I’ll explain why by asking you a question:

In these two, three, four, however many years of effort, don’t you think you would have shifted by now?

Think about it. You’ve oversaturated your mind with the intention to shift. You do all your methods correctly. You try to convince yourself that you're already in your DR. You feel symptoms. Sometimes you even "mini shift." And yet… you're still here. Doing the same things. Searching for advice that leads you right back to doing the same thing:

Trying to shift. Trying to trigger a shift. Trying to shift your awareness.

Trying.

Trying confidently.

Trying hopelessly.

Trying angrily.

…Trying.

If you were going to shift by inducing a shift, triggering a shift, or successfully shifting with a method, it would have happened by now.

“But Clover, I still have a lot of soul-searching and work to do! I just need to put in more effort!”

Awesome! Then click away, because this advice isn’t for you. I’m not talking to you.

I’m talking to the person who is tired. Who is drained. Who, despite applying all the sage advice on the internet, is just burnt out from the process of shifting.

And if that sounds like you, let me repeat: Maybe you need to stop actively trying to shift.

Your work is done. And that’s a good thing.

You’ve spent years ingraining the idea of shifting into your subconscious. You’ve impressed the intention to shift so deeply that it’s already there. Congratulations! You did all the mental work. It’s done.

Your DR is already yours. You already have the ability to shift.

So stop trying to trigger it. Stop trying to make yourself shift.

Let go of the “making yourself shift” process.

“Oh my god, she’s going to tell me to take a break.”

LMAO you thought.

Yes, breaks are excellent. They help reset and recharge your mindset. I always encourage taking breaks if you need them. But let’s be honest. Sometimes, even the thought of taking a break feels just as mentally exhausting as staying on your shifting journey.

“Oh no, she’s going to tell me to do nothing at all.”

Once again, you thought.

Instead, you’re going to capitalize on the fact that you’ve already done all this work. The intention to shift is always, always, always in your mind. Your subconscious knows you want to shift. Just like it knows how to shift your awareness.

So, the next time you lay down to do your shifting process...

Instead of trying to shift…

Instead of trying to induce a shift, induce the void, or force an outcome…

Give yourself exactly what you want.

Give yourself the feeling of being in your DR.

Drop the conscious, active intention to shift because your subconscious already has it covered. You don’t need to keep hammering it in. Instead, focus on inducing the emotions you would feel if you were in your DR.

Imagine waking up in your DR. Imagine being there. Imagine spending time with your DR friends, your S/O, whatever makes you happiest. Personally, I lean toward wake-up scenarios. You can listen to music, meditate, visualize, even do a shifting method if you enjoy it—but instead of doing it with the intention to shift, you’re doing it just to give your body and mind the feeling of being there. The happiness, the calm, the excitement, whatever it is for you.

This does not mean you’re lying there thinking, “Okay, this is going to make me shift.”

No. No, no, no, no, no.

Drop the idea of shifting entirely. That process is done.

And I’ll say it one more time:

If you were going to shift by inducing a shift, making yourself shift, or triggering a shift, it would have happened already.

So let it go. Drop it.

Induce the emotions of being in your DR, and then let go. Once you do that, go to sleep. Or go about your day. That’s it.

So why does this actually make you shift?

Because feeling is the language of the subconscious.

Think about it: The moments in your life that shaped you the most weren’t just things you thought. They were things you felt deeply. Joy, fear, excitement, grief. Emotions imprint on the subconscious. That’s why certain smells, songs, or places instantly bring back vivid memories. Because your subconscious records experiences based on emotions, not logic.

So when you stop trying to shift and instead just focus on feeling like you’re in your DR, your subconscious responds by aligning your awareness to match that emotional state.

Because to the subconscious, there’s no difference between imagination and reality. When you visualize something vividly enough, your brain fires the same neurons as if you were actually experiencing it. Athletes use this trick to enhance performance. Musicians use it to refine their skills. And guess what? It works for shifting too.

When you let go of the effort and just immerse yourself in the emotions of already being there, you bypass the resistance that trying creates.

And that’s when the shift happens.

It happens because you stopped forcing it.

It happens because your subconscious already knows how to shift, you just needed to get out of its way.

So, again, drop the struggle. Drop the effort. Stop trying to shift.

The more precise or perfect you want the shift to be, the more pressure you put on yourself. Your brain rebels against that because rigid control drains energy.

Remember this:

High Emotion + Low Attachment = Flow.

When you feel something strongly but aren’t clinging to the result, your subconscious has room to act. This is why sometimes, when you care less or focus on something in a passing, emotional way, it manifests easily.

This is why people can give up on shifting entirely and shift. This is why people let go of the need to shift and shift. This is why you shift without meaning to.

You: “No, I can’t do this! I need to keep trying to shift or else my subconscious will think I don’t want to shift anymore!”

Me:

*As always, take what resonates, discard what doesn’t, because we’re all different people who need to hear different things :)

[purplesaline]

If you want to learn to communicate better more clearly, and more effectively take notes from the Autistic community.

No that wasn't a typo. Autistic folks are some of the BEST communicators out there. The reason they struggle so much isn't that they're bad at communicating, it's that WE'RE bad at communicating and they lack the ability to bridge that gap. Autistic communication is very assertive, say what you mean, mean what you say. Ask questions to try and understand the core truth of something rather than make assumptions. Be open to changing your opinion and beliefs when enough logic and/or evidence supports the opposing idea. Ask for things you want, don't hint at it and hope someone makes the right assumption. Don't expect people to read your mind and just know something is bothering you.

Allistic communication relies on so many unspoken rules and expectations, and it's even different across the gender binary as well! It's a big part of why men and women so stereotypically struggle to communicate clearly.

Of course this is a generality, not all autistic folks and not all allistic folks etc., etc. and there is purpose to the sort of small talk allistic folks tend to be naturally good at and autistic folks tend to struggle with. When it comes to conflict management teams though having a few autistic folks in the ranks can be incredibly helpful.

The biggest thing we can do to help mitigate conflict in communities though is to let people make the "wrong" choice without judgement. If people are afraid of being judged for their choices they aren't going to come back to the community to ask for help when they realize they made the wrong choice which will just cause them to either leave, or double down and create more conflict. Not to mention very few choices are ever have a objective right and wrong answer. You need to provide as much information as you can so the person can make an informed decision and then you need to trust that the person to make the best choice for their situation (because you don't know all the variables in their life that inform that decision). Sometimes they will make mistakes and as long as you maintain a space free from judgement they're likely to come back and ask for help getting onto the right path. That is how you keep a community of people with different beliefs and ideals together.

Lastly, there are of course behaviours that are unacceptable in any given community. Note that I say behaviours rather than beliefs here. It's an important distinction. I can be in a community with someone who believes that me being gay is a sin long as they behave with respect toward me. Be clear and up front about what behaviours are acceptable in your community and which are inappropriate. It can help here, as well, to avoid being judgemental about these things. One of the phrases I've used a lot when resolving conflict in one of the communities I've created is (paraphrased) "[behaviour in question] isn't acceptable in this space. If this is something that is important for you then this space might not be the right fit for you and you may feel more comfortable in a space where [behaviour] is acceptable. We value the contributions you've made to our community and you're welcome to remain if you refrain from engaging in [behaviour] in our space."

There will be, of course, more extreme ideologies that you'll want to keep out even if those ideologies and beliefs aren't acted on in your community space. Being a Nazi elsewhere and behaving themselves when they're in your community, for instance, isn't the same as someone thinking you're going to go to hell because of your sexuality but has no intentions of speeding up the process. Keep in mind the more ideologies and beliefs on your no compromise list the smaller your community will be. Sometimes a small community isn't an issue but there will be times when you need a larger community in order to achieve your goals so you'll need to look at which of those ideologies you'd be willing to compromise if those goals are important to you.

And I'll leave it there because it's already far longer than I meant it to be.

[blubunz]

JUST TONIGHT

— bodyguard! leon s. kennedy x f! model! reader

《MINORS DNI!》

Tags: porn with plot, maybe slowburn? slight slowburn, pet names, fingering, masturbation.

A/N: a real sucker for this AU i just want myself a man like this tbh. anyways I write this when I can't sleep even though I clearly have to wake up early tomorrow. (Okay it's afternoon now um WHY IS THIS SO LONG😭 I DID NOT EXPECT IT TO BE LONG)

Throughout your career, you weren't in need for a strong, brooding figure to protect yourself, you weren't fond of having anyone watching over you — it made you feel like you're just a weak girl, a damsel in distress who always needs a knight by her side.

And you are, you need someone to be by your side and protecting you from harm. Sometimes you do reckless things, and not to mention those times where you made stupid decisions that almost cost you your life if not for Lady Luck. But Lady Luck can't stay with you forever, and you don't want to be living on edge so constantly. It makes you look like a madman and, most of all, losing sleep, bad schedule and then it escalated to affecting your career and hard work.

And that's why he's here.

You've heard of him before, not on the news, but through whispers and rumors. Of all the things you've heard from them, you're surprised how Leon isn't on the news as much, maybe he's laying low, or maybe he's working for the government, all private and redacted matters.

So then, how exactly did you manage to hire him?

For one, you're curious enough to search him up. His name isn't hard to find, and you admit he looks good, perfect for modeling. The problem is that he hardly uses social media. If he does, then maybe he goes by some other names, or he doesn't post a lot. You found out about Claire Redfield though, at first, she doesn't leave much impression to you, but the pictures she posted have that same familiar face, albeit Leon is looking like a grumpy uncle who would give bad advice to his nieces in each photo.

Once you've decided that it was enough to go stalking people's profiles, you go and make a call using your fame and broad connections in and out of your industry. You got his number in your contact within two days, and your hands are shaking as you try to call him.

It's not that you're scared of socializing, it's just that you're hesitant of making this decision, of finally have someone to protect your life, of admitting that you seek help and reassurance.

But, the possibilities of death and dark thoughts fill your mind quickly enough, and you convince yourself you need this, for your own sake.

“Hello?”

“Is this... Leon Kennedy?”

It's been a month since Leon's been here. Truth be told, he doesn't care much about how people are falling in love with you, mainly just your looks and charisma. He's heard of you many times, so many times, you keep appearing on magazines, billboards, the news, advertisements and more. God, there was this one prime time of your life where your face was practically everywhere! Not that you're no longer famous, but that was the time where your life was endangered the most by how crazy your fans were — another reason why Leon is here.

Upon interacting with you during your own time, Leon found out you're not like how the media portrays you to be. He isn't a stranger to it, seeing famous people and important figures always having to smile and maintain a certain persona for the sake of the community. Sure, you have that bit of yourself in it, but when he escorts you hone, it's when he sees your fatigue.

Your shoulders slump as you sigh, putting your bag on the coffee table as the TV is playing some shows for white noise, you're scared of the quietness — having thoughts that might hurt yourself. Leon closes the door and locks it safely, carrying your bag up to your room.

He doesn't need to do that, Leon's aware his job is to protect your life, not servicing you like a maid ir servant, but he keeps doing so, helping you with the small things like carrying your belonging, to making meals for you.

“You can't sleep now.” Leon sighs, seeing you lying on the couch, eyes closing. He doesn't want to startle you, so he picks you up and carries you into your bedroom, seating you by the make up table.

This is a change of pace for Leon, everything he does has to be careful for you. No longer picking up guns to shoot bio organism weapons or anything of the sort, instead he's now attending to a young model. Two different lives, and Leon finds himself hard to adjust, remembering the times you joke about him acting awkward sometimes when you tried to talk to him normally.

Your name comes out of his lips, sounding sweet and calm. And your eyes open, lazily rubbing off your make up while Leon prepares the bath for you.

“You don't have to do that.” You say once he steps out again, smelling a bit of the bath bomb he put in.

“I know. But, protecting your life is my job, and caring for your bare minimum needs is included.” He explains, and you just nod, not quite sure if they're connected in your mind.

Still, you let him undress you. Your cheeks flush at the way his fingers hook under your top to remove it, oh the slight contact when his hand brushes over your tits or ass. And sometimes you find it crazy how it's you that's the one being attracted to someone, and not Leon, who never advances himself on you, he doesn't even react when seeing your body, you find it weird, but intriguing too when your looks being the most important aspect of your industry, you've gotten used to the attention and the reactions.

In reality, Leon is still human, he admits your body is attractive, he wishes to lay his hands on your body with a more intimate intent, with more sensuality rather than just helping you with undressing or carrying you, his eyes linger on your skin, seeing that your body isn't that perfect as they claim to be, and he imagines himself kissing your flaws, to be the only one seeing your most intimate areas. But he's worked long enough not to let his feelings get involved, he can't bare it not after—

“You can... let me go.” Your voice cut through his thoughts, and Leon lets you go, he didn't even notice he was holding you still, zoning out and staring at the back of your neck.

“Right, sorry.” He clears his voice a little, sitting by your bed to wait for you to finish shower. He brushes a hand through his hair, finding himself longing for some alcohol to drown out this feeling. And that's also a problem. You've said you don't like the smell that lingers when he drinks, making excuses on how it affects your own scent, and people won't find you as attractive. He just stops drinking when he knows he'd have to see you later, not quitting for good, just pausing to prioritize his job — and in within case, his job means you.

Stepping in the shower, you can't help but fantasize about Leon, you can't believe that you fell for him first, and now you're imagining his hand cupping your mound, squeezing you and rubbing your clit. You gasp, eyebrows furrowed with clear displeasure on your face — your fingers aren't enough, you need a hand big like Leon's, to feel those rough pads of skin trailing down your body.

Grumbling in frustration, you go ahead and finish showering.

Leon finishes checking over the securities and ensuring that no one was lurking near your home, he get back to the living room only to see you in your robe, making some tea for yourself.

“Tea?” You ask, passing him the cup before he could say anything.

“Thanks.” He swallows, eyes flickering to your form hidden under the thin silk robe painted by your favorite color, somehow seeing your body like this is much more arousing than when you strip down naked, it teases his desire, and it leaves him chasing that tantalizing image. You catch his lingering gaze, and your eyes twinkle with a hopeful glea. Maybe he likes you too? Even if he's attracted to your looks, you can work your way with making him love you fully. After all, he's the only one who sees you in your most vulnerable moments. He's special, and you let him know of that privilege.

You head off to your room, with him following behind. Leon helps you with closing the curtains and removing your robe, palms firmly rubbing your shoulders. You shiver, letting the garment pool at your feet before seating on your bed in just your lingerie.

Leon tucks you in, and every time he does things like this, he gives you that flutter in your stomach, god, it's always the little things that get to you.

“Goodnight—”

“Leon, wait.” You reach up, tugging on the sleeve of his shirt, and he looks at you with an unchanged expression.

“Yes?”

“Um...” You hesitate, will Leon find this weird? No, no, maybe you can make an excuse, saying that you're too paranoid. “Can you... stay in my room? Just tonight?”

Leon nods without hesitation or any questions. He sits by the chair near your makeup table and plans to just read something to pass the time.

“No, not there.” You say, your voice sounding abrupt as you try your best not to appear so needy. But you can't. You're just naturally so. “In my bed, please?”

Leon bites the inside of his cheeks to hold back his smile, you sound so cute with the little "please" as a cherry on top. He complies, sitting at the edge of your bed, a hand on your ankle.

“Is this good enough for you, princess?” He smirks, and you feel your cheeks flush. “Or do you want me to hold you close, hm? Protect you from the monsters, yeah?”

“That... That wouldn't be a bother.” You murmur, and Leon takes it to heart, taking off his jacket and crawling up to your side. Leon gets you on his lap, pushing your head against his shoulder.

“Better?” He asks, voice muffled from his lips pressed against your hair, smelling your shampoo.

You nod, hiding your flustered face in Leon's shoulder, that elicits a laugh from him and he brushes your hair. He rubs your back soothingly, feeling your body relaxes under his grip.

Leon traces his hand down to your lower back, kneeding your soft buttocks. You take a sharp inhale, subtly pushing up against his palm.

His eyebrow raises, smirking against your hair before rubbing your thighs, and you spread your legs open for him. Leon doesn't say anything and just watches your reaction. He can feel you breathing down his neck. Your heart picks up its pace in excitement.

“Do you like this?” He keeps the pace slow, rubbing up to the waistband of your panties.

“Mhm...” You nod.

“Want more?”

“Mhm.” You nod again.

He hooks his finger under the band, and pulls the garment down, enough to let his hand slide in, brushing just over the top near your aching clit.

The moment his middle finger presses against your bud, you moan, hips twitching against his palm.

“Have you been dreaming about this?” Leon asks, and you only whimper in response. His finger moves down, collecting your juices and pulling out, tasting your essence on his finger.

“Me too.” Leon admits, and he shoves his hand back to your cunt, pushing a finger through your entrance.

“I've been wanting this too. Even more, wanna feel this tight cunt around my dick instead.” He groans, the way your walls tighten around his finger is enough to make his cock leaking pre-cum. “Fuck— you're so tight already, hm? I bet you cum with just my fingers.”

You mewl, hips rutting against his palm, and Leon pushes another finger in, spreading your pussy open so that you can fit his cock.

“Oh, god, Leonnnnn!” Your eyes roll up as he pumps his fingers in and out of your cunt, juices drooling down his hand. “Mngh, f-fuck—”

“Good girl.” Leon whispers, kissing down your neck whilst your body trembles, shaking high in pleasure. “That's it.”

His thumb rubbing harshly against your clit, making your whines higher and higher, you sound so needy and desperate, an side of you that you don't want anyone to see — anyone but Leon.

Leon grunts, feeling your juices dampening his pants, right against his bulge. His cock throbbing in his pants, just aching to pound that tight pussy of yours. But he puts you first, making you cum and high in ecstasy.

“Mm, gonna cum, baby?” He coos, feeling your cunt clamping down his fingers. “Cum, baby, be a good girl and cum f' me.” He increases the pace and intensity of his thrusts, dreaming of them being his cock instead.

You moan loudly as you squirt against his palm, and your knees buckle, legs shaking and body trembling as you collapse on his body.

“Gooood girl.” Leon kisses your forehead, rubbing your back with a free hand while he sucks off your juices from his fingers. “Now, ready for the main event?”

You feel his cock twitches under you, and you can feel yourself heating up again. You gulp, wrapping your arms around his neck and grinding against his bulge.

“Yeah.”

[shoyoist]

chat do we accept thirsts in this room ....... i cant stop thinking abt rin literally being a canonical drooler like hello??? new fap material finally

seeing him like that made me sit up straight fr like ohhh he's the kind that goes crazy huh!! content: fem reader, making out, a lil unintended choking, MESSY pussy eating ++ (unprotected) missionary so he can drool onto your tits!

itoshi rin who just gets a little too lost in the heat of his desire. he may be all cold eyes and dismissive comments — acting the part of a man who cares for nothing but himself, but anyone who knows him knows different. especially you, his sweet girl that's crawled her way into his heart and knows him best.

when he lays eyes on your body, dressed so pretty in the colors he likes best on you, looking at him with the sort of anticipation in your eyes that somehow make you look so innocent to him; it makes his mouth water.

he doesn't say much, but you know almost way more than you need to by how he handles you. pressing up against you, hands gripping the back of your thighs and dragging you up against him so his bulge presses into your lower stomach. swallowing thickly as he runs his eyes over you one more time before going in for a kiss.

you know he tries to maintain his composure — but you really do drive rin crazy. his kisses are open-mouthed, sloppy, and he groans with his tongue down your throat. "pretty." he says under a breath, sounding almost shy if not for the dirty words. "what's this for? you want a nice, good fucking, is that it?"

he says it like you've been provoking him till he finally snapped. but really, all he did was take a look at you dolled up for him. he's the one that wants to fuck you nice and good.

itoshi rin who nearly hits his own head on the headboard with how fast he gets on top of you in bed. bracing himself against the board with one arm, he kisses you, so wet and sticky; his other hand finds the plush of your tit and squeezes, thumb flicking your nipple.

he grabs you by the throat like he's about to tear into you with his teeth, and he takes your breath away as he kisses you up the side of your jaw, leaving little bites here and there. he ravishes you, saying nothing but an occasional whisper of praise or a curse that slips out between kisses.

itoshi rin who grabs your hips again and spreads your legs apart, pushing your knees nearly to your chest so he can have all the room he wants to eat you out. your pussy's wet enough that it glistens up at him, and you think he even takes a fucking sniff of it before he lowers his mouth on it and sticks his tongue right in your cunt.

"rin!" your gasp goes entirely unheard — the taste of you is the one other thing that keeps rin sane, and he likes to have his fill of it. his tongue is long, and he loves fucking you with it. it would embarrass you if it didn't feel so fucking good — so loud and sloppy, drenching your thighs and his whole face, spit trailing down the curves of your ass to soak into the sheets. he's so messy with it.

he laps at your folds, curling his tongue and taunting your clit, taking both forever and too soon to drive you past the edge to your orgasm. and god, does he make you cum. by the time he gets you there, it's so damn wet you wouldn't know if you'd squirted all over his face or not.

he comes up for a kiss with a mixture of his spit and your slick dripping down his chin, and when your mouths meet you taste your own pussy on his glossy lips. "god, rin."

"mm," he gives you only a brief answer, eyes clouded over as he palms his boner, sticking his hand between your legs to wet his it before giving himself a few pumps. "good girl."

he doubles over to suck on your tits as he slips his dick into you, and he groans along with your gasp of his name as he goes all the way in. and he loves how you tremble against him, trying to stay coherent for him as he taps your cheek and makes you look up at him.

"so deep," you sigh out for him, knowing he likes to hear it. "so big, rin." he kisses you with his first thrust, eating your moan up before pulling away and finally focusing on his own pleasure.

itoshi rin who fucks you with his mouth open and his tongue out, bending down every now and then to kiss you, and each time he pulls away there's strings of spit between your mouths that disconnect and drip down both your chins.

a sheen of sweat forms over his skin, and the dark strands of his hair stick to his forehead as he holds himself up over you, cock twitching in your cunt as he increases his pace, chasing his high. he doesn't even notice when a string of drool falls from the tip of his hanging tongue and hits your chest right between your tits.

in all fairness, you don't notice either. he's got you feeling so much else, so much pleasure, you don't feel a thing else.

and when he cums, he fills you up with ropes of sticky white before pulling out, getting the rest of it on your stomach and tits, beads of cum decorating your skin as you gasp his name.

"fuck, rin, you make such a fucking mess." you tell him as fiercely as you can, but all rin pays attention to is the way your body trembles and spasms with little waves of bliss. you're so fucking pretty — he wants to do it all over again.

[insidekatmind]

Math-Hector Fort

Request:yes!

You're sitting on your bed, textbooks and physics notes scattered in front of you. Hector sits beside you, legs crossed, a notebook resting on his lap, twirling a pencil between his fingers. He should be focused on the exercises you're explaining, but his eyes are fixed on you heavy, attentive, unwavering.

You pretend not to notice. You flip through the pages, find the right example, and try to bring him back to reality. “Okay, let’s try again. Here, you need to apply this formula.” You point to the step with the tip of your pencil, but Hector doesn’t respond. He doesn’t even glance at the paper.

You turn toward him, only to find his gaze already locked on you. Dark, slow in its movement, tracing every detail of you like you’re the only thing worth paying attention to in this room.

“Hector.” His name leaves your lips as both a warning and a breath you didn’t realize you were holding.

“Mmh?” he asks, looking at you with feigned innocence.

“I asked you to focus.” you answer seriously.

He tilts his head slightly, the corner of his mouth curving up in a ghost of a smirk. “I am.”

You know full well he’s not talking about math. Heat rises to your throat, but you try to keep your composure. “On your exercises, I mean.”

“It’s not my fault there’s something much more interesting right in front of me.”

Your breath catches for a second. He doesn’t move away, doesn’t joke like he usually does. His gaze is different this time deeper, more intense.

You wet your lips without thinking, and his eyes flicker downward, following the motion in the most subtle way. The tension between you thickens, silent, dense like the air before a storm. The textbook in your hands suddenly feels useless forgotten.

“Hector…” you try again, but your voice is softer now.

He leans in slightly,just enough for his knee to brush against yours, just enough for his breath to mix with yours. “Tell me,” he murmurs, and there’s something in his tone that sends a shiver down your spine.

You should take control, pull him back on track, remind him that he’s here to study… But when his hand moves slowly, barely grazing the hem of your shirt as he presses it onto the mattress beside you, every rational thought dissolves.

“You said if I did my exercises, we could negotiate a break,” he says, his voice low, almost a whisper. “But since I can’t seem to focus…”

He doesn’t finish the sentence. He doesn’t need to. The way he looks at you, the way every inch of his body seems drawn toward yours, already says everything.

Hector smirks at you and pulls you into his lap. His arm wraps around your waist effortlessly, his grip firm, yet his touch is unusually gentle. He positions you on his lap, a smirk still playing on his lips. The unexpected proximity makes your breath hitch, your body reacting to his touch almost instinctively.

“You should focus on math, you're behind,” you whisper, placing your hands on his shoulders for support. Hector's smirk deepens, his grip on your waist tightening for a moment as he pulls you even closer.

"Math can wait," he breathes, his eyes locked onto yours, dark and intense. "I've found something much more interesting to focus on." The heat of his body is intoxicating, his closeness making it difficult to keep a clear thought.

His gaze flicks to your lips, then back to your eyes. "Besides, you're more distracting than any math problem." His thumb brushes lightly against your hip, sending a shiver down your spine. The air between you is charged with electricity, both familiar and tantalizingly foreign.

“Baby, you have to do math,” you whisper softly. Hector leans in closer, his face now just a few inches from yours. "But look at you," he murmurs, his voice low, dripping with a mix of amusement and raw desire. "You're all flushed, your eyes are wide, your breath is ragged... And you're in my lap. What's a guy supposed to focus on in this situation?"

Your heart skips a beat at his words, but you try to maintain your composure. "You can focus on the equations you need to solve," you manage to reply, but your voice sounds weaker than you'd like. The proximity of his body, the feel of his hands on your hip, his breath grazing your skin, it all makes staying focused on anything except him impossible.

“Equations?” Hector repeats, a hint of mockery in his voice. “That’s not what I want to solve right now.” He tightens his grip on your waist, pulling you even closer, his body pressed against yours. His lips are so close that you can almost feel the heat radiating from them. “I want to solve you.”

You gasp lightly, your fingers involuntarily gripping his shoulders, his words hitting right on your nerves. “But you need to study-” you start to say, your voice a soft protest against the mounting pressure between you.

Hector’s smirk widens, his gaze traveling from your eyes to your lips. “I’ll study later.” He leans even closer, his mouth hovering just above your ear, and his next words are a hot whisper across your skin. “Right now… I have other things to focus on.”

His mouth moves down, grazing lightly against your neck, and your breath hitches. You want to protest, argue for his education, for rationality, but your arguments are fading away under his touch. The math book lies ignored on the bed next to you, its contents losing relevance with each passing second.

“Baby,” you whisper, gently pulling his face away from your neck. "you have to do math". Hector's gaze flicks up, a hint of surprise in his eyes as you pull his face away from your neck. He looks at you for a moment, a mix of frustration and desire in his expression, but mostly just pure adoration. "I don’t care about goddamn math," he mutters, his voice almost a growl, but there's a hint of amusement behind it.

He leans in again, his lips brushing against the skin just below your jaw, his hands roaming across your back, pulling you closer, almost possessively. "I care about you,” he whispers, the sincerity in his voice taking you aback. “And right now, all I want to do is this.” His mouth finds your neck again, this time with more urgency.

You sigh softly and cup his face, kissing him softly. Hector reacts instantly, his arms wrapping around you, pulling you flush against him as he kisses you back. The kiss starts gentle, soft, but there’s a hunger beneath it, a need that quickly starts to grow more urgent. His fingers dig into your back, his touch possessive, eager, as if trying to pull you even closer, as if trying to make you a part of him. He deepens the kiss, his breath coming in ragged, and you can feel the restraint he’s holding back in himself.

Your fingertips trail along his jawline, tracing the sharp line of his cheek, before your hand comes to rest at the back of his neck, pulling him closer. His lips move against yours with a growing insistence, his tongue tasting and exploring, his body pressing against yours with a desperate hunger. You can feel the heat radiating off him, the intensity in his touch, and it makes you want more.

Hector drops his book and math notebook on the floor while he was still kissing you and you giggled breaking away from the kiss. Hector chuckles, the sound low and sultry, a smirk playing on his lips. "Don’t wanna study anymore,” he mutters, his eyes roaming over you, filled with unconcealed desire.

His hands slide down your waist, gripping your hips with a possessive grip. "I’ve found something much better to focus on."

[saeist]

it was just a mission. something about gathering intel at some event. it's simple, you've done this multiple times but the main problem? your boyfriend is pretty hands on with these kinds of missions

it wasn't out of the ordinary that you would be sent out on missions with nagumo. you two are members of the order and maybe to the higher ups, it was way more convenient this way (not that you minded)

now here you are, in a bar at some skyline rooftop in tokyo, gathering much information you can about an upcoming grand ball happening in a few weeks

your boyfriend, who happens to be your work partner is seated beside you, casually having a great time at the bar

in work settings, you and nagumo maintained a professional relationship. not only that it helps with your work ethics, it also prevents potential problems that may come in your way with your relationship (in regards to the work place. you wouldn't want to bring problems into your own home, now would you?)

but sometimes nagumo may take things too far just like right now.

nagumo had managed to find an important figure for the event and as expected, he charms his way to get information out of her. you watch them like a hawk as nagumo basically impresses this woman so much that she's already spilling company secrets to him

in retrospect, nagumo could've gotten this information in millions of different ways and scenarios. he has done shit like this too many times to count but since you were his partner for this specific mission, where's the fun in doing things he'd usually do without you?

he takes a look around the bar. just for a second to check if you were already looking at him– you are

nagumo holds in his smirk as he turns his attention back to the poor woman who was now babbling on about her life and company secrets

"that's cool" nagumo nods along to whatever the woman was yapping about, "so you're like super involved with the process of the production? that's interesting" nagumo hums, his voice dropping an octave lower in order to sound seductive just to see your reaction

now, you aren't exactly the jealous type. you were an assassin, you were bound to get into situations like this. it's all part of the job but something about nagumo flirting his way through this mission was rubbing you the wrong way

was it the drinks? it couldn't be. you are basically trained to withstand alcohol consumptions no matter how much you drink

the woman was now wrapped around nagumo's finger with the way she was giggling like crazy. twirling her hair and all as she leans onto nagumo's chest

nagumo got her right where he wanted

nagumo pauses his little chitchat with the woman to steal a glance towards your direction. you aren't exactly looking right at them but your bloodlust and hostility was going off the roof that nagumo couldn't help but look over

when you feel his gaze, you only look at him with a neutral expression though nagumo sees right through it. your eyes don't lie. you wanted to kill both the woman and him at the same time. he can literally see how you wanted them dead on the spot

the woman, still oblivious to your presence nor what you meant to nagumo, decides to take it up a notch and place her hand on nagumo's exposed chest

nagumo's eyes widened as he tries to pry her hands off of him. oh fuck, he thinks to himself. totally not expecting the woman to be handsy

the woman caresses his chest as she stares at him like he was eye candy (he is). she couldn't help but gasp at the sight of his exposed tattoos. fuck. maybe i should've just kept it at bay from the start, nagumo thinks to himself. he then stiffens when he feels the woman brush her fingers against his tattoos. his hand flies towards her wrist to brush her off as politely as he can.

nagumo tries to keep his expression as casual and neutral as he can but how could he when he can feel your intense stare at the side of his face.

he's so fucking dead

you click your tongue loudly in annoyance. the glass in your hand cracked under your grip. you were too busy ignoring the simmering feeling to notice til you felt some liquid seep through your fingers. nagumo nervously looks over at your direction again, trying to telepathically tell you to calm down

"so nagumo, any plans for tonight?" the woman purrs, leaning back on him

okay. that was your last straw.

you slam the glass down on the countertop, breaking it into tiny pieces. you push yourself off the bar as you make your way to the car. the mission might as well be over with since nagumo basically gathered all the information you two needed

nagumo winces as the glass shattered. even scaring the poor woman who's all over him. she grumbles about how you were too drunk to notice that you were getting physical

"i'll be going to the bathroom for a bit, excuse me" nagumo chirps, effortlessly pushing the woman off of him as he catches up to you

he's definitely done it this time around

nagumo makes a face as he rushes towards the parking lot where you were likely most waiting in. he considers the mission done when he got every possible detail needed for the upcoming plans

now onto his next mission: how to calm your not so jealous, jealous girlfriend down

when he makes it to the parking lot where your car was parked at. he was pleasantly surprised that you were waiting for him. for a second there he thought he would have to take an uber back home

you were busy distracting yourself on your phone when you hear a knock at the window. without even looking up, you unlocked the car and waited for nagumo to get inside

"hi" he greets, sitting on the passenger seat, "have i ever told you that you look beautiful tonight?" nagumo smiles, leaning over to your side to peck your cheek

you don't spare him a glance. hell, you didn't even acknowledge him. instead, you start the car and get the fuck out of the parking lot

"whoa! someone's in a hurry" nagumo jokes, gripping on the grab handle tightly as you floor it through the streets of tokyo. you ignore him and grip the steering wheel tighter. so tight that your knuckles turned white

you can't tell if nagumo still couldn't get the hint with the way he was just sitting in the passenger seat like the passenger prince he is. your eyes flicker towards his direction for a second and there you see his infamous smile on his face

for some reason that just upset you further

so you took a sharp turn that the tires were screeching. nagumo yelps in surprise

"babe, i'm gonna throw up at this rate with the way you're driving!" nagumo whines, reclining the seat back so he could rest a little. he was already getting a little car sick

"then get out and walk home" you snap, slamming on the breaks. nagumo was thankful that he had his seatbelt on or else he would've already flew out of the windshield

"oh so you are mad.." nagumo murmurs, "like mad mad"

you never wanted to strangle your own boyfriend til now. you can't even tell if he's being serious or being a little shit (it's most likely the latter) but the icky green feeling in your stomach was basically controlling you and your emotions right now

your silence was the answer nagumo needed. he lets out a chuckle. you are so easy to read

"is my baby jealous?" he teases, nudging you a bit. you shake off his touch, not wanting him to touch you in any way shape of form despite being in the same car as him, "you totally are" he coos, laughing at your reaction

you grit your teeth in annoyance, "i don't know, am i?"

nagumo hums, entertained by this whole conversation. he has never seen you act like this so this was a first. who knew you'd be cute like this

"it was just for the mission, baby. don't be upset" he says, reaching out to pinch your cheeks

"it wasn't just the mission, nagumo. you let her flirt with you" you seethe, frustration and irritation bubbling inside you

nagumo leans back on his seat, tapping his finger on his chin as if he was deep in thought. "well, i had to get the information one way or another so why not make her believe that she was some hot shit?"

"so you think hitting on people even when you have an actual partner, that was beside you the whole time mind you! would be the perfect way to fish out information? wow" you retaliate, shoulders dropping as you stare at the empty road in front of you

nagumo winces at your words

"okay maybe the flirting bit was a little too much–"

"what the fuck? so does that mean you do this every single time when you need intel behind my back? all this fucking time?" you cut him off, turning to nagumo with hurt evident on your features

nagumo's eyes widens at your accusation. he would never!

"what? baby no! i would never do that to you!" nagumo argues, sitting up properly. the look on your face is something he never wants to see ever again. seeing the hurt on your face hurt him more than a blade piercing through his skin

"i mean that maybe this time it was too far! i would never do that to you. it just so happens that the woman was flirting with me even if i was just being nice! i'm sorry baby. for the woman and for the way i acted tonight. i'm sorry" nagumo apologizes sincerely

you don't say anything. you continue to focus on the road so you could get home in one piece. nagumo waits and watches for your reaction but when he notices that you aren't saying anything he sighs

nagumo carefully reaches out for your hand that was on the gear shift. he slowly intertwines them together and places your hand on his lap

"baby, i'm really sorry that i made you feel this way. it wasn't my intention" nagumo rubs his thumb across your hand, "i just thought it may be a little funny to see how you'd react if i let other people flirt with me–"

luckily you were already on your street by the time nagumo was rambling because hearing his words just now made you slam on the breaks

"jesus babe. if you want to kill me then just stab me in the heart instead of trying to make me fly off the car" nagumo groans as he lurches forward but the seatbelt that he was wearing prevented him from flying out

"you deserve it" you glare at him, shaking off his hand as you exit the car. nagumo follows like a lost puppy

by the time you finally get inside your shared apartment, you were still irritated with nagumo, who has not left your side since. he's been following you around the house. from the living room to the bathroom and now at the kitchen where you were making yourself some tea to wind down before going to bed

nagumo wraps his arms around your frame and rests his head on your shoulder as you boil water on a kettle

"... are you still mad at me?" he mumbles in your ear, watching you add your usual spoons of sugar on your cup

you huff, "is it not obvious?"

"sorry"

nagumo pouts and decides pushes his luck. he presses a soft kiss on your cheek, in attempt to make you swoon. usually on normal days, this would've worked

"that's not gonna work this time around" you grumbled, turning off the kettle as it goes off. you pour yourself some hot water as nagumo continues to hold you close to him

"what is?" nagumo decides to play coy. again, you were just so easy to read. this time instead of kissing your cheek, his lips ghost against your jawline. nagumo feels you stiffen at the gesture. he smirks, hands sliding down your abdomen before they rest on your hips

"still mad?" he purrs in your ear. you shiver when you feel him finally press his lips against your jawline and trail kisses along side of it. he then flips you around, your back is now pressed against the cold tiles of your kitchen island. you stare at nagumo with wide eyes. you were supposed to be mad at him!

nagumo leans in, slowly closing the distance between you. his eyes flicker between your lips and your eyes like he was waiting for you to say something but instead he notices the way your breath hitches and your fingers twitching against the countertop like you were holding yourself back

"if you're still mad then let me make it up to you, baby" nagumo chuckles, hands rubbing random shapes on your exposed skin. you narrow your eyes at him, silently challenging him to bring it on. you aren't going to give in that easily

although all those thoughts go out the window the moment you feel his lips against yours. as cheesy as it is and no matter how long you've been dating nagumo, every time you two kiss its like time slows down and sparks fly

your hands immediately find their way around his neck, closing the distance. nagumo hums against the kiss, looks like he finally won you over

things take a turn after that and let's just say your tea is now long forgotten and maybe he may or may have not made it up to you

[savourandswell]

Dude you dissapeared just few months and you blew up!! What the hell did u do this time? So hot and inspiring! Congrats!

HAHA I knowwwwww. I can honestly say it just kind of… happened. I wasn’t trying, the weight just keeps coming. Thinking about my routine though, there are a few tips I have for anyone aspiring to or struggling to gain. So here they are…

WEIGHT GAIN TIPS FROM SAVOURANDSWELL

#1. 🥛MILK🥛:

I love milk. The value of milk to growing and maintaining my weight cannot be overstated. I consider it the most important aspect. A litre of whole milk contains anywhere from 650-850 calories, nearly double that if it’s Half&Half. SODA DOESN’T COME CLOSE TO NUMBERS LIKE THAT‼️ That’s not even to mention how nutritious milk is, you’ll get fatter, but somehow feel fitter. Trust me- if you want some easy gains, drink less soda and more milk.

#2. ❌No Small Snacks❌:

Small snacks will sabotage your appetite. If you’re hungry but all you have available is a packet of chips or some fruit? Leave them, stay hungry. Let that feeling grow- let your mind be consumed by the thought of food and wait until you have the chance to eat a real meal. You’ll eat far more calories then than if you’d given in for a paltry couple hundred.

#3. ⬆️BIG Meals & Eat Them Quickly⬆️:

If you can handle it, cut out snacks completely and eat 2-3 big meals a day. Your stomach will struggle to feel a difference between a huge amount of calories eaten far apart and a small amount eaten regularly throughout the day- but the scales will notice. 6000 calories spread across 3 meals will leave you feeling no more full than 2500 spread through small meals and snacks.

When you do eat your meals, EAT FAST. None should take much longer than 15-20 minutes, if they do, your body will start to feel it and your appetite will fail. I love to savour my food- but I save that for fancy dinners and sessions with a partner. If you want to gain, eat quickly and without very much thought at all. That leads me to my next point-

#4. 📱Eat Mindlessly📱

Don’t think too much when you eat, not even about how much you’re enjoying the food. There’s a real and powerful connection between mind and body- if you’re truly aware of how much food you’re eating, you will feel more full. Try not think about it, distract yourself by watching a movie, or YouTube, or talking to someone. Have all your food ready next to you, and shovel it in while you focus on something else.

#5. 💤Eat Your Biggest Meal Just Before You Sleep💤

Conventional wisdom states that eating before you sleep will make you fatter because your body is more sedentary- that doesn’t really make much sense, a calorie is a calorie regardless of when you eat it. HOWEVER, much of my previous advice will be perfectly applied by eating at this time. You will have had to wait quite a while between meals to eat at this time, making you very hungry. You will be tired, helping you to eat mindlessly. Besides that- you will get the pure bliss of descending into a sweet food coma every night, and leave just enough time for you to wake up hungry all over again.

Well, that’s it. Some quick tips from savourandswell. They may not feel applicable to you, they may even seem undesirable for the kind of lifestyle you want to live… HEY, that’s fine, no problem. This is just one fat guys tips, there are tons of ways to gain weight and mine may not work for everyone- but it’s worked for me, and that’s worth considering. Good luck ;)

[elysianholly]

A Spuffy Fan's Perspective on the Reboot

So, as most Buffy fandom knows (unless they’ve been living under a rock in a crater on the Hellmouth), it was announced yesterday that SMG is involved in a Buffy reboot sequel series, one in which she will be a recurring but not central character.

As a lifelong Buffy fan, I’m expected to be overjoyed at this news, and I’m, well, not. Nor are a good number of people deeply entrenched in fandom. I’m super happy for the people who are excited. As a Spuffy fan, though, it’s hard to be jazzed for a number of reasons, among these being that SMG is most definitely a Bangel shipper, and despite being overwhelmingly more popular than Bangel in current times, Spuffy is often overlooked in a lot of key areas of the “official” Buffy promotions, the comics being a notable and welcome exception.

One thing I’ve noticed is a lot of people in Spuffy fandom are more than just “not normal” about Spuffy. I’ve struggled for 20+ years to both identify and articulate why the ship resonates with me so much to the point that news like this can make my anxiety spiral. I understand it’s not an ideal reaction media, but I have lived inside a neurodivergent brain my entire life and that ain’t about to change. And I’m not the only one—I’ve met and interacted with many, many people who feel as intensely as I do and also struggle to articulate why news like this distresses them.

So for everyone who is like me, slightly more than just “not normal” about Spuffy (or any aspect of Buffy!) and distressed about the news, here are some things I keep reminding myself.

Buffy is an Established Multi-Universe Property

We know that there are multiple universes in Buffy; it’s explored in The Wish and then confirmed by Anya later in the series. Not just multiple dimensions, but divergent/adjacent worlds to the one we saw in the show. This has been later explored in the comics, such as The Lost Summer, the Boom reboot, and The Last Vampire Slayer, never mind the plethora of authorized novels and the recent audio play. These were all officially sanctioned, licensed productions that exist outside the official canon.

All of these stories matter, regardless of whether or not they’re considered “official.” For my Spuffy people, some are Spuffy friendly and some are not. We acknowledge what we want to acknowledge and leave the rest behind. Me? If I find the sequel reboot upsetting, I’ll mentally shove it into one of those other worlds, the same as I’ve done with the comics for years (yes, even if they got Spuffy friendly).

One of the points that was brought up yesterday when I suggested just giving the sequel reboot the comics treatment was it’s harder to ignore if SMG is involved. And I get that; I felt the same way about the Slayers audioplay, because significant OG cast members were involved so it felt more official. But upon reflection, I do still think it’s the same as the comics, which were spearheaded and overseen by JW and still considered (until this sequel reboot happens) the official post-series canon. If the involvement of original artists is what makes or breaks something’s authority, then the medium shouldn’t really matter.

And on that note…

Star Wars Legends, Halloween, Terminator, & Other Reboots

For years—decades—following Return of the Jedi, the official Star Wars canon was continued in novels, the same as Buffy was. There was a rich tapestry of intergalactic politics, Leia and Han’s Force family, Luke and Mara Jade, and characters like Grand Admiral Thrawn that proved so popular he’s been recanonized.

These books existed and still exist. The new movies, the reset of canon, all things involving Rey Palpatine Skywalker and Kylo Ben Ren exist alongside established, official property. I know plenty of people who were upset that their investment in the extended Star Wars family was essentially nixed with the sequel series 10 years ago, and others who chose not to acknowledge the sequel series but maintain their post-Jedi canon.

In an era of reboots and sequel series, canon can become a bit diluted. You can’t just erase everything that came before you decided to hit the “start over” button. The recent Halloween trilogy flat-out ignored multiple movies to tell the story it wanted to tell. Terminator has done the same thing, multiple times, with the Sarah Connor Chronicles being officially licensed and more or less officially scrapped, and the last Terminator movie retconning like, what, four or five that came out after Judgment Day. That is to say, established canon doesn’t really matter in this era, because the people making these decisions are doing what fan artists have done for decades; keeping what they want, tossing all else aside, and focusing on the story they want to tell.

If what came before and what has been long established doesn’t matter (and I actually do love this; it opens up worlds and essentially gives us licensed what-if fics), then canon itself is kind of nebulous. It doesn’t matter what is or isn’t established, because established canon is a moving target, subject to personal interpretation. Don’t like the Halloween reboot? Ignore it. There are other movies out there. Don’t like the clusterfuck Disney has made of Star Wars? There is a fully developed alternative. Don’t like any of the options? Come up with your own. Comics do it all the time with superhero stories, and Buffy is nothing if not a superhero.

It’s All Fiction

This is what drives my husband crazy when I try to explain my beyond not normal feelings about Spuffy. It’s all fiction. We’re not talking about historical events here. All fiction lives in exactly one place, ultimately, and that’s between your ears. If you don’t like the way a fictional story went, you can do what fanartists have been doing for years and create your own fix-it. Or find a ready-made fix-it; I promise it exists. And the more I think about it, the less stock I put into “official” stories that are told primarily to make money. The people who are here telling these stories because they love the characters and know the characters on levels that frankly outperform most licensed stuff.

In Summary

So I’ve rambled a lot, but here are the key points to take away:

Buffy is canonically a multi-universe property so the world we’re shown by official licensed sources see isn’t the only one that exists. I didn’t say this in the section, but in this way, all fanfic is canon, because each exists in a different universe

If canon is not sacred in the world of reboots, then what they try to sell us as canon is debatable, negligible, and ultimately fine to just not acknowledge

Official canon doesn’t really matter all that much when you can pick your own, which you can and should

I hope this helps my fellow Spuffys and anyone else who is struggling with the news. My siblings in beyond just not normal. Your feelings, even if you have trouble explaining or understanding them, are valid. You’re not silly. It’s never silly to be upset about news that impacts something important to you. And there’s still so much we don’t know, so speculation abounds, but whatever comes of this, I hope you find some comfort in the freedom of being able to do exactly what the for-profit storytellers do all the time and just fucking ignore what doesn’t suit them.

In the meantime, Elysian Fields Archive will remain a Spuffy exclusive safe space, and I imagine will be home to a shitload of fix-its if the pilot gets picked up, so you’re free to join us there.

Until then, be good to yourself, and to somebody else.

[sylussflower]

Let's talk about Sylus's recent secret time, "Heatwave."

Sylus—the man who lived his life all alone, who never received comfort or warmth when he was sick, and who is at constant risk of showing vulnerability because of his many enemies. He has always been a hyper-independent person, believing he can handle everything on his own. Imagine living a lonely and dangerous life, yet deep down, there’s an unhealed inner child secretly longing for comfort and warmth when sick. It’s heartbreakingly tragic.

When he says, "No one is allowed here," it’s because he doesn’t want to show his vulnerable state. He’s convinced he won’t receive any comfort, but then he sees MC. That’s when he realizes—she is the exception. She can give him the warmth and care he’s always needed.

And the way he asks, "Let me use your lap as a pillow," "Be gentle," and "Hold me"—it’s as if he transforms into a needy and clingy person, allowing his wounded inner child to seek healing. When he refuses to take medicine because it's bitter, it's like he's finally letting himself act stubborn, just like a child who wants to be taken care of. Gosh, I will never get over the fact that he acted like a baby! This is such a rare and beautiful side of our beloved Onychinus leader.

Then, we see his possessive side emerge:

He asks, "What's on your neck? You were putting on lipstick, and it accidentally got here." Then he kisses her neck and says, "I won’t believe that."

The way he questions the lipstick—almost as if he’s making an excuse for why her neck is marked—shows how much it bothers him to think of someone else being close to her. Even if she says it was an accident, he chooses not to believe her, because deep down, he wants to believe there’s something more—something his.

And the kiss? That’s both a possessive act and a desperate attempt to feel connected to her. It’s as if he’s silently saying, “You’re mine,” even though he refuses to acknowledge how much he truly cares.

This scene captures Sylus fighting so hard to maintain control while unknowingly revealing his feelings—his jealousy, his possessiveness, his desire for her. He’s caught between protecting himself and letting his emotions slip through the cracks. It’s raw, messy, and powerful.

And then, he calls her "Ice pack."

That’s such a soft Sylus moment! He’s still holding on to his tough persona, but his tenderness seeps through. Calling her "Ice pack" is his way of keeping things casual, but it also shows how much he craves her care. And when he asks her to hold him—that’s a huge step. He’s letting go of his usual control to let her in.

Finally, when he says, "We should have done this earlier," it feels like he’s realizing, maybe for the first time, that it’s okay to be vulnerable with her.

Our Sylus is finally allowing himself to be open, little by little.❤️

[capsfriendly]

with the caps at home vs the panthers tonight, i wanted to come on here and say a couple things about the panthers’ visit to the white house.

i’ve seen some people on here and on twitter pointing out the hypocrisy of certain players who have vocally supported diversity initiatives in hockey turning around and doing a photo op with a man who is nakedly trying to strip marginalized people of their rights. the sense of betrayal those fans are feeling is completely justified. despite appearances, conservative politics are incredibly popular among nhl players. i’m not writing to defend any of these men (my views lean pretty far left), but to share my understanding of the ways north american hockey as an institution perpetuates conservatism.

1) barrier of entry

ice hockey requires a lot of equipment to play. to be able to put a child through the decade or more of club dues and equipment fees required to begin seeing returns on investment—in men’s hockey, this begins with stipend pay at the major junior level in north america—requires an amount of money that many families simply cannot pay (though there are a bevy of charities trying to combat this). sports like soccer and basketball, which require comparably little equipment, are far more popular among both players of color and players from low-income families, especially in countries where hockey isn’t a national pastime.

because of this economic disparity between those who can play hockey and those who can’t, locker rooms can turn into eco chambers of privilege.

2) lack of higher education

i’m not sure of the data for other countries, but in the united states, there is a high positive correlation between holding a college degree and voting for democratic candidates. north american players are drafted to the nhl from major junior and collegiate teams, and entrance to professional leagues cuts their education short.

nhl players drafted from collegiate teams often enter the league without completing a bachelor’s degree, getting a year or two of higher education. during those years, many pick classes that they already have a strong knowledge base in, aware they’ll need to keep their grades up to maintain their university’s gpa requirement for athletes. because of this, many miss out on subjects that would teach them about systems of inequality like statistics, sociology, and studies of groups of historically marginalized people.

major juniors players, who move away from home in their mid teens, are even worse off. they leave school, usually completing the bare minimum requirements of a high school diploma to focus on their development as players and travel for games. and up until a recent vote, athletes from the canadian major junior hockey leagues were ineligible from playing ncaa hockey.

3) body economics

like all athletes, hockey players’ bodies are their jobs. the natural decline of their bodies over time limits their playing careers to the years of their lives when they can physically compete with both opposing players (to win games) and their own teammates (for roster spots).

the mean nhl career is 7 years. many hockey players don’t learn another trade and have no guarantee of making a successful career transition after retirement from playing (though some go on to coaching and media positions).

this creates a pressure to make as much money as possible while they still can, knowing that every time the take to the ice to do their jobs, they risk the very things they use to earn money: their bodies.

the physical nature of hockey means that a career-ending injury could come at any point. holding onto their earnings, knowing they’ll likely make up the bulk of income over their entire life, is essential to ensuring the comfort and health of themselves and their families.

earning high paychecks for an inherently limited number of years, it becomes attractive to these players to support candidates who promise to cut taxes for the rich, something popular among conservative politicians. while players may bear no ill will to members of historically marginalized groups and may even support their rights and freedoms, their personal economic situations lead them to vote for politicians who perpetuate that marginalization.

there are plenty of straight-up bigots playing major league sports. the panthers shouldn’t be singled out for visiting 1600 pennsylvania avenue. not because supporting the current administration isn’t reprehensible, but because it isn’t unique among hockey players—or even among athletes.

[hansmic]

˚➶ ｡˚ “𝐼 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓃𝒶 𝒷𝑒 𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒, 𝒷𝓎 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓈𝒾𝒹𝑒 ˚➶ ｡

bangchan x gn! reader

summary: In the middle of your busy lives, You end up spending a simple evening in each other’s company—no grand plans, just the pleasure of each other’s presence. It’s a reminder that, even in the rush of life, being together is all that really matters .

genre: fluff, romance

warnings: none

word count: 1.0k

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It was a day just like any other, and it seemed like there was no end in sight for the hustle and bustle of the day. You were drowning in your busy schedule, constantly trying to maintain a perfect balance between your work and relationships. However, there was always one person in your life who seemed to understand and embrace your hectic lifestyle without a second thought – Chan

As the day wore on, the exhaustion started to settle in. The tiredness crept into your bones, making every task more challenging than usual.

As the sun began to set, you found yourself slumped on the couch in Chan's apartment, completely drained from the busy day. Chan had noticed your exhaustion and immediately came over to check on you. He gently sat down next to you, his eyes filled with tenderness and concern.

"How are you feeling?" Chan asked, his hand tenderly running through your hair. "You look like you've been working yourself to the bone."

You let out a weary sigh, feeling the weight of exhaustion on your body. "I just feel so drained, like I can't keep up with everything," you mumbled, burying your face in your hands.

Chan's eyes softened at your words, his heart aching at seeing you so worn out. He gently took your hands in his, his thumbs tracing soothing circles on your skin. "It's okay to take a break, you know? You don't have to do everything all the time."

Your eyes met his, appreciating his understanding and concern. "I just feel like I'm falling behind, like I have to constantly be productive and on top of things," you said, a hint of frustration in your voice.

Chan's expression filled with empathy. "I get that it can be overwhelming, but sometimes, you have to remember that being productive doesn't mean neglecting yourself." He paused, his gaze unwavering. "You're important too. Remember that."

You stared at him, touched by his words. A soft smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you slowly nodded in agreement. "You're right, I guess I have been putting too much pressure on myself. "

A warm smile spread across Chan's face. "Don't be too hard on yourself." He gently pulled you into a comforting hug, his arms wrapping around you securely. "You deserve to rest and care for yourself as well."

You melted into his embrace, the warmth of his embrace seeping into your tired body. A sense of peace started to settle within you as you leaned into his touch. You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to be enveloped by his love and understanding. "Sometimes I just needed to hear that," you murmured softly, your head resting against his chest.

Chan let out a comforting hum, his fingers tracing gentle patterns across your back. "You're not alone in this, you know." He pulled away slightly so he could meet your gaze. "I'll be here for you, always."

You felt a wave of gratitude and affection wash over you. The exhaustion from the long day seemed to melt away as you looked into Chan's eyes, the sincerity in his gaze reassuring you. Without a word, you reached for his hand and intertwined your fingers with his, seeking more comfort in his touch.

Chan's expression softened even more. "I know we both have a lot going on, but being together like this means everything to me." He tightened his grip on your hand slightly, as if to emphasize his words. "I don't need fancy plans or expensive gifts - I just want to be here, by your side."

You felt your heart swell with affection, touched by his simple yet profound love for you. "You always know just what to say, don't you?" You smiled, intertwining your fingers with his even tighter.

Chan chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "What can I say? I just speak from the heart." He gave your hand a gentle squeeze. "And my heart belongs to you."

Your smile grew wider, your heart feeling like it could burst with happiness. The simplicity of his words and the honesty behind them meant the world to you. "You're too good to me," you murmured, bringing your intertwined hands up to press a soft kiss to the back of his palm.

Chan's cheeks flushed a faint shade of pink at the gesture, a small smile tugging on his lips. "I'm just speaking the truth." He said, his thumb tracing soft caresses against your skin. "You deserve nothing less."

Your heart was practically melting as Chan's words filled the air. It was moments like these that made everything else seem to fade away. With a soft sigh, you leaned a little closer, your heads almost touching. "You always know exactly what to say to make me feel loved," you said, lifting your gaze up to meet his eyes, "and I can't help but fall for you more each day."

Chan's eyes locked with yours, his smile widening as he soaked in your words. "I'm glad I can make you feel that way," he said quietly, his voice filled with a mixture of tenderness and contentment. "Because you make me feel the same way, and I would do anything to see you happy." He gently cupped your face with his free hand, his thumb brushing against your cheek in a tender touch.

The room fell into a comfortable silence, the only sound being the soft ticking of the clock on the wall. Chan's fingers continued to weave through strands of your hair, while his other hand gently caressed your skin. The exhaustion from earlier had faded, leaving a warm, fuzzy feeling in its place. Chan shifted slightly, bringing you closer as he leaned back against the sofa.

"You know," he started, breaking the silence. "We could stay like this all night."

Your heart fluttered at his suggestion, a soft smile curving your lips. The thought of just spending the entire night in each other's company without any plans sounded like pure bliss. "As long as you are there, I would be content," you replied, snuggling closer to him.

Chan's arms automatically wrapped tighter around you, his fingers tracing small patterns on your back. A soft hum escaped his lips, a sign of contentment. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

He buried his nose into the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent, relishing in the closeness and comfort.

The night ticked by in a slow, comfortable rhythm. Chan and you spent the evening wrapped up in each other's presence, the warmth of your bodies and the steady beat of your hearts creating a soothing melody that seemed to drown out everything else.

As the night grew darker and silence enveloped the apartment, Chan's arms remained firmly around you, not showing any signs of letting go anytime soon.

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hope you liked it!!

masterlist is here!

[nbmudkip]

rehyperfixating on a children’s game that came out in 2015, is one of the least popular entries in its series, and has minimal content, the vast majority of which i’ve seen before. the series has been dead for nearly 10 years, nothing has happened recently that would warrant anyone’s returning interest in it, very few of my friends give a shit about this specific game, and those few who played and liked it in the past have no reason to give a shit about it at all right now. i have been coasting through on a playthrough i’ve been doing with a friend who’d never seen the game before and who was kind enough to let me show it to them, but we just beat the game, and after we play the epilogue we will have nothing left to do, and on top of that they really have just been humoring me as they have their own very strong current hyperfixation they would much rather be thinking about. also i am depressed enough right now that literally nothing else except for waiting to play this game with them and playing this game with them and watching them enjoy it at least a little has been able to briefly quiet the constant cacophony in my head screaming how much of a worthless, lazy, constantly-failing miserable excuse for a living person i am and how much better everything would be, especially for myself, if i stopped existing lately. would anyone like to volunteer to 🔨💥⚒️Kill Me With Hammers🔨💥⚒️ because i would really like for someone to 🔨💥⚒️Kill Me With Hammers🔨💥⚒️ right now

[wizardnuke]

does anyone know if we have to roll that rock up the hill again tomorrow

[shirogane-oushirou]

☺️: replaced my ipad screen protector (and -- shock and awe -- for the very first time ever i see no bubbles?? and the only piece of dust is on the outer edge away from the active part of the screen?? despite my messing shit up Royally on application??? wild.), so i can draw my beloved again!! and maybe properly explore a pk.mn au!!!

😔: i am Quite Sick this week. lol. lmao. and i've been kind of all-around burnt out socially for a few weeks. i'd like to finally continue playing the otome game i'd been waiting for since like 2020 but havent touched since i got it in Fucking September Holy Shit. I Want To Kiss One Of My Longest Running F/Os. Please. ...so i might actually be around a little less for a while. 👋🏻

[2-kamikou-1]

ok but no guys seriously how do you ask for reassurance in a way that doesn't make you look like a stupid yandere stereotype

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...